Why I Don't Write

I'm sure you're finding it quite peculiar that the title of my post is the exact oppposite of what you're reading right now. I'm not a writer by any means, I'm more of a "I have so much to express that I need to speak it right now!" type of person. However, several events have transpired in the past 3 months that have sparked my interest in taking pen to paper, or rather finger to keyboard.

About 3 months ago my father passed away. I'm 28. My brothers are 22 and 17. I could say that I never would have thought in a million years I would be in this situation, but I would be lying. My dad was an unhealthy man. He worked 60 hours a week most of my life. He would commute an hour each way to put food on our table. And in the end, we are left provided for but fatherless. I am incredibly grateful for his sacrifice and through this I have learned hardwork and dedication to my family and friends.

My jobs have changed. I have an 8 - 4 job with some contracting on the side. It's been 3 years since I've had to be in an actual establishment to work. While having less flexibility, I now have an impact on small children and the education they receive. I finally understand the idea my father strived for; independence.

I finally live in a place of my own, no roommates, no family members, and no shared entrance. It may have taken 28 years, but I finally feel independent and free to be who I am, in the space that I live.

These events have changed me, while mostly for the better, in a way that I never would have imagined. This is why my "why I don't write" has turned into "why I must write". This blog will be a myriad of who I am, what I'm working for, and hopefully an inspiration for others. I'm struggling with grief but that doesn't define me. I want to help other's on their journeys through grief, anxiety, weight loss, whatever it may be.

I write because I'm not broken. Life moves on with or without us, and it's up to us to decide if we continue on.

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